Reader,
Ever had this belief that ... you must be a perfect public speaker before you go on stage?
Isn't ironic?
How could you possibly be an excellent speaker if you haven't been on stage before?
Think about it ...
Public speaking is a skill, not a talent. Like any other skill, it can be learned.
And public speakers are made, not born.
This quote fits quite nicely:
"As long as you can speak, you can become a public speaker." —Manoj Vasudevan
Also, Ralf Waldo Emerson had famously said this:
"All great speakers were bad speakers at first." —Ralf Waldo Emerson
Some of the most influential speakers we all know were terrible at it when they started out.
Indeed, they suffered from this very anxiety that you and I had to suffer.
To mention a few ...
Winston Churchill struggled with speech anxiety and froze; unable to speak more than a few words during his maiden speech in the House of Commons.
Abraham Lincoln suffered from speaking anxiety for a long time. Once invited to deliver a keynote speech but afraid of criticism he abruptly declined it.
Mahatma Gandhi was due to speak in a court and only managed to say the first sentence of his speech before his throat dried up and an assistant stepped in and finished the speech for him.
Mark Zuckerburg was described as 'literally dissolving in a lake of his own sweat'. He had an assistant blow-dried sweaty armpits before a speech to get rid of anxiety sweat.
Warren Buffet would arrange and choose college classes to avoid speaking in front of others. He once said ... “you can’t believe what I was like if I had to give a talk”
Julia Roberts had to go through speech therapy to get rid of a stutter and gain the self-esteem boost to become a great public speaker
Joel Osteen once said that he got nervous by simply reading the church announcements; today, he’s worth over $100M
Sir Richard Branson once said ... “my biggest fear is speaking in public because I usually start shaking, or sometimes I can’t speak at all”
... and many many more famous people suffered from Glossophobia like you and me, Reader.
And now ...
Let me ask you this: does perfection exist?
No, because something you may deem to be perfect might be flawed to someone else.
Perfection is a subjective term.
You might be thinking ... Waqas, then what do we aim for in public speaking and in general?
The answer is one word:
Growth ... And that's what I believe in.
Growth in comparison to your yesterday, last week, last month, and yesteryear self.
As Bob Ross famously said, "As long as you are learning, you are not failing".
If you wait to be "perfect" before you start public speaking, you will NEVER become a public speaker.
So ... act today!
I strongly believe public speaking should be approached in two stages.
Stage 1 - Fighting the limiting beliefs behind your speaking anxiety
Imagine your public speaking anxiety stems from the belief that I am not good enough to be a public speaker.
Do you think any amount of practicing will help you debunk this limiting belief?
... maybe, but how many months or years of practice?
Would any amount of fake it until you make it work?
I don't think so.
The mindset and belief systems are our operating system (OS) like the one in computers and smartphones.
If something is wrong with the operating system (like Windows, Android, Apple iOS, etc.) you can't fix it by replacing or installing new hardware components on your computer or smartphone.
You would either need to reinstall the OS or update it.
That's exactly what we need to do first:
To update your belief systems around yourself and public speaking.
The result of stage 1 is ...
You being able to confidently make a conversation with the audience from the stage the way you do it at the dinner table.
To me, this is good enough to become an anxiety-free confident public speaker.
In fact, this is perfect if you are aspiring to be a storyteller. All you need to do on stage is tell your stories the way you'd tell them to your family at the dinner table.
Stage 2 - Learning the art of public speaking
This stage is all about taking your public speaking skills to the next level.
It is about learning ...
- how to craft an engaging message
- how to use your hand gestures and body language
- how to use pauses strategically for impact
- how to remove fillers from your speech
... you get the idea, right?
We should think of this stage more like lifelong learning ... it takes years of practice to fully master the art of public speaking.
But remember ...
It is a BIG mistake to jump to this stage without working on your mindset and core limiting beliefs that are causing you speaking anxiety in the first place.
I overcame my public speaking anxiety in Nov. 2022—It took me almost 2 years to do so.
Why?
Because I made the same mistake as most people: I skipped stage 1 because of sheer ignorance.
And I must confess ...
Although I claim that I got rid of the crippling fear of public speaking in Nov 2022, it's NOT completely true
... I was still worried that my speaking anxiety would come back.
But I fully overcame it after working with my speaking anxiety coach in 2023 who helped me with eliminating my limiting beliefs such as ...
I am good enough if others think well of me
and
... mistakes and failures are bad.
So, don't make the same mistake I made and gain speedy and long-lasting results by working on your mindset and beliefs first.
If you know someone who could benefit from this newsletter, I’d love to have them join our community of fearless public speakers. They can subscribe here.
BRINGING IT HOME
TL; DR
- You don't have to be an excellent speaker before going on stage.
- The quickest, long-lasting, and permanent solution to conquer your speaking anxiety is by working on your belief systems and mindset first before you start practicing.
Feel free to reply to this email if you have questions or feedback on this newsletter.
TWO MORE WAYS I CAN HELP YOU
1 - FREE Guide - Want to speak confidently without feeling overwhelmed by nerves? Grab this free step-by-step guide which has the essence of my hard-earned lessons and insights. Click here to download and uncover some surprise bonuses too.
2 - Social media - I share practical tips and insights on public speaking and communication skills. If you are active on Youtube, Instagram, or Threads, let's connect.
Best,
Waqas - Founder & Speaking Anxiety Coach
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