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Limiting Beliefs Behind Public Speaking Anxiety [5 Self-limiting Beliefs]
5th Issue of NewsletterFree Your Voice from Speaking Anxiety |
Happy Fearless Sunday! Let's get into some of the root causes of the fear of public speaking.But before that let me share a quote:"As long as you can speak, you can become a public speaker"
—Manoj Vasudevan
2 stages to overcome public speaking anxiety and become a confident speaker:
Limiting beliefs play a leading role in hindering us from succeeding in Stage I. LIMITING BELIEFS BEHIND PUBLIC SPEAKING ANXIETY [5 SELF-LIMITING BELIEFS]What is a Belief?A belief is your interpretation of reality that you hold on to as THE TRUTH. But it may or may not be the truth. Not long ago, I've realized this that beliefs run every aspect of our lives. For instance, beliefs make us ... Eat healthy or unhealthily, Frown or smile back at strangers at a grocery store, Spend extravagantly or be miser, Speak fearlessly or get worried sick when asked to speak. This is how everything we do is tied back to our belief system: 3 Common Ways to Form a Belief
A Self-limiting BeliefA self-limiting belief is a perception about us that restricts us in some way. There is nothing else that destroys human potential more than our self-limiting beliefs—and the worst part is that we never realize it. Our self-esteem and self-limiting beliefs are formed at the age of 6-10. Examples of some self-limiting beliefs are ...
Top 5 Self-limiting Beliefs Behind Public Speaking Anxiety1 - I'm not good enough Not long ago, I worked with a client who suffered from public speaking anxiety since his childhood. After doing some digging, we found out that his fear of public speaking was caused by these 2 self-limiting beliefs: "I am not good enough" and ... "I am not smart enough".
If someone has such self-limiting beliefs, no amount of practice or rehearsal will make them completely free of the public speaking anxiety. They will always feel inadequate. They wouldn't even dare to go up on stage because of this internal voice in their head: "You will never be good enough". No amount of "Fake it till you make it" can eliminate self-limiting beliefs until we intentionally work on it and eliminate it from the root. After I worked with my client and eliminated this belief, he found the process liberating. "It feels as if a heavy burden has been lifted from my chest", he confessed. 2 - What I have to say is unimportant Wouldn't you conclude the same if "this" is how your parents treated you?
I know I would conclude "I am not important" and ... "What I have to say is unimportant". This self-limiting belief makes us feel less confident and causes anxiety around public speaking. I believe every single one of us has something unique to share that people would find interesting, insightful, and worth sharing. It could be ... Your unique take on life, How you overcame the biggest life challenges, Your crazy stories, Your ambitions in life, OR Any peculiar trait you may want to share ;)
3 - I'm not a born public speaker I had this belief my entire life. I used to believe: "Public speaking is a talent and not a skill" and ... "Public speakers are born, not made". Guess what ... I was wrong! Don't believe me? Google up the following names and read their early public speaking career:
4 - I'm not eloquent enough to become a public speaker Public speaking does not require you to be eloquent and a master of using advanced vocabulary. Public speaking is about ...
As long as you can speak, you can become a public speaker. Remember ... Public speaking is not about wielding an involved and labyrinthine lexicon that no one would apprehend and correlate with 😉. 5 - What makes me good enough is being perfect Being a recovering perfectionist, I think this belief has been the most difficult to eliminate. I still struggle with it sometimes ;)
The way I formed this belief was through receiving compliments. Whenever I'd receive a compliment that I am a perfectionist, I'd unintentionally associate being perfectionist with me being good enough. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with doing things perfectly, But ... It sure is a problem when you associate it with you being good enough or capable enough. For example, "I am good enough only when my presentation or talk is perfect and free of any mistakes and errors" This is a limiting belief because ... It will cause anxiety around public speaking and consequently you will never partake in public speaking.
In contrast ... The belief "mistakes and errors are part of the learning process" gives us freedom to make mistakes and improve. We become less anxious and open to accepting our flaws. "Growth only happens when we succumb to being human and begin accepting our flaws" —Anonymous BRINGING IT HOMETL; DR These are the 5 most common self-limiting beliefs behind public speaking anxiety that no amount of practice will get rid of:
Feedback: If you have any thoughts, I mean ANY THOUGHT, or any questions about this week's issue, do not hesitate to reply to this email [waqas@denverspeakup.com]. I will be happy to read and respond 😀. TWO MORE WAYS I CAN HELP YOU1 - Free live webinar - I will host a Live FREE Webinar on Friday (@12:00 PM MT, 11:00 AM PST, 01:00 PM CST, 02:00 PM EST) in which you will learn three secrets to overcoming your public speaking anxiety. 2 - Social media - I regularly share practical tips and insights on public speaking and communication skills. If you are active on Youtube, Instagram, or Threads, let's connect. P.S. If you know someone who could benefit from this newsletter, I’d love to have them join our community of public speakers. They can subscribe here. Thanks! Best, Waqas, Founder & Speaking Coach |
Free Your Voice from Speaking Anxiety
The only newsletter you'll ever need to overcome the crippling fear of public speaking and gain the self-confidence you always desire. (Loved by 1300+ readers every week)